3.6 Not What It Should Be

Walking into the dark and silent cemetery Caleb looked cautiously around for signs of Star. A part of him felt foolish there was no way Star was the one upset with them. There had to be another explanation. Something tapped his shoulder. Turning he saw no one. Another tap had him turning around again "Star?" he questioned.

"How nice," she growled becoming visible "you remember me."

"Of course I remember you. I love you," he affirmed.

"You have a funny way of showing it" shouted at him "you love that purple haired girl."

Facing her, Caleb could feel as well as see her anger, it washed over him like a tidal wave. For the first time he wondered if coming here by himself was such a good idea. Maybe he should have listened...."Star what happened to you? The Star I knew would never be like this."

"No one ever tried taking you away from me before," she retorted "say you won't see her again. That you're mine. Now and forever."

"Star please," Caleb begged "if you ever loved me please don't ask me to do this."

"You love her more than me," she protested.

"I love her," Caleb acknowledged "what did you expect? That I'd pine for you until the day I died? I did for almost twenty years. Isn't that enough?"

Crossing her arms she shook her head "I want what's mine. You're mine. You belong with me..."

"Not anymore," Caleb stood before her saddened beyond words at what she had become "you died. I moved on. I'm sorry but that's how it has to be." Reaching out beseeching her "I'm sorry you never got your fairy tale ending. You deserved that."

"Yes I did," Star retorted "instead I got this. Tell my why I should let you have it instead?"

"You loved me once and I think you still do. When you love someone you want what's best for them even when it hurts." Caleb watched as the corners of her mouth softened and for a moment thought he was getting through to her.

"If you loved me you'd dump the little tart."

Shaken to his core Caleb took several steps back tripping over something he hit his head on a head stone with a solid thud. Star stood over him smirking in anticipation....

Floating above his daughter watching her sleep "Honey wake up," Robert said loudly in her ear.

Opening her eyes she smiled "daddy?"

"I'm sorry honey but you have to hurry. Caleb's in trouble."

Waking instantly with a thrill of fear knifing it's way through her heart. "Where is he?"

"In the cemetery," Robert informed her "his conversation with Star didn't go as planned....he's hurt." Having said that he vanished reappearing beside Caleb where Star hovered above his body.

"Caleb sweetie if you love me you'll come be with me," Star coaxed. She could sense his spirit struggling and knew she'd soon have what she wanted. 

Robert saw the sparkle that only a spirit could detect as another spirit started to depart their body. He commanded "Caleb stay with your body. I know it's hard but Drew is coming. It's not your time. 

You've got to hold on." Observing the sparkle cease Robert turned to Star "don't do this," he entreated "it's wrong and you know it."

"He's mine," she yelled back "he belongs with me."

"Do you think he'll ever forgive you for doing this? Think Star before it's too late. He'll be pining for Drew when he crosses over. He may be with you but he'll still not be yours. Let him go. You're time has past."

Looking down at what she had done she knew Robert was right. Caleb would never be able to forgive her if she forced him to come to her. He had to want to come to her. There was only one way she knew to accomplish that now. She needed something he would give his life for and she knew exactly who that was ...."you win," she said turning to Robert "this time" she added before vanishing from view as Drew came running up the path.

Falling to her knees beside Caleb she cradled his head in her lab "Caleb honey can you hear me?" He groaned in response. "Daddy what happened?" she asked looking up as tears rolled down  her cheeks.

"He tripped," Robert told her avoiding providing details. 

She looked up at him through her tears "she did this didn't she?" she asked while stroking Caleb's face.

"He tripped," Robert repeated.

"Answer my question," Drew yelled in anguish "I'm not a child. I know he came her to talk to Star. To reason with her if he could." Sobbing "I shouldn't have let him come alone. This is my fault."

Kneeling beside her Robert stroked her hair "Sweetie it's not your fault. Caleb should have listened to Amanda. Star isn't who she once was."

"What happened to  her?" Drew sniffed "Why is she so angry? I thought she loved him. I don't understand."

Reaching out he touched her cheek "oh sweetie sometimes when a spirit is unable to move on they become unstable. I think that's what's happening to Star. I hope to reach her, at least I'm going to try to help her before it's too late."

"Daddy will what's happening her, happen to you?" Drew asked anxious to know how much time she had before he too became unbalanced.

"I don't know sweetie," he smiled at her "I hope to have moved on before that happens."

"No daddy you can't," she protested.

Shaking his head "I know sweetie but I can't stay here forever. I had a good life. I had six beautiful children who I loved deeply."

"But daddy what if the scientists are able to resurrect you? You can't go until they've perfected the procedure."

Robert heard the anxiety in her voice and wished there was something he could to alleviate it. "you need to live your life sweetie. My time has come and gone. When all my children no longer need me I'll move on and wait to see you on the other side."

"I'll always need you," Drew cried

"No sweetie you won't. You already don't but your siblings do; especially your sister. She's messing with things better left alone." Robert stopped listening "I've got to go the paramedics are coming."

Drew bit her lip to keep from calling out to him. She wanted him to stay. She missed  him. She had a dull throbbing ache in her heart where he existed. She looked down at Caleb and smiled as she found him staring up at her "Caleb sweetie you're going to be alright."

He frowned staring blankly up at her "Drew?" he asked his voice high with fright "Drew where are you?" he asked becoming agitated.

"I'm right here," she grabbed his hand as she moved out of the way of the paramedics. 

He struggled to sit up despite their efforts "Drew where are you?"

"I'm right here baby," her worst fears began to surface watching him turn in her direction. It was like he was searching for something unable ...."can't you see me baby?"

Shaking his head tears streaming from his eyes "I can't see....can't see. Where are you?"

"I'm right here baby," Drew moved closer to stroke his face. "See I'm right here. I'm not going to leave you. You've got to lie still so the paramedics can look you over. She tried to soothe him as he struggled "it's alright baby. I'm right here." She took his face in her hands and kissed him.

"I can't see" he repeated clinging to her.

"I know baby," She stroked his face trying to be strong for him. "Just lie still so we can get you to the hospital. Get you all fixed up."

Caleb listened to her voice. Closing his eyes and just listened to her voice. He felt a prick in his arm as he squeezed his eyes shut willing himself not to look. What was the prick? He couldn't see anyway what was the point of looking? What was he going to do? What if he never got his sight back? What if he was blind forever? Why didn't he listen? Why did he think he could reason with her? Why did she do this? He felt Drew's hands stroking his face, wiping his tears away. He couldn't even protect her. What use was he to anyone now?

***

Several hours later Drew sat in the waiting room clinging to her mother. "Mom what if Caleb is blind forever? What will we do?"

"I don't know dear," she pulled back a little to soothe her daughter's hair "do you love him?"

Nodding "yes with all my heart," Drew sobbed.

"Then it doesn't matter whether he can see or not. You love Caleb as a whole in sickness and in health. You'll manage. You'll make adjustments. He's still the same person he was before."

"I know mom" she mumbled "it's just that he's been through so much already. He doesn't deserve this...."

"No one ever does," Grace smiled sadly "sometimes it's these adversities that make a person who they are." She patted her daughters hand "let's not assume the worst. Try to be positive and wait to see what the doctors have to say."

"What's taking them so long?" Drew asked plaintively for the hundredth time.

Grace was about to reply when she looked up and smiled.

"Want me to go and find out?" a deep voice asked.

"Jeffie? Jeff you came," Drew leaped up and threw her arms around her brother.

"My sister is in trouble, of course I came," he squeezed her tight. Looking around the waiting room frowning "where's everyone else?"

"They'll be here later," Grace said "everyone's so busy. Where's Diana? I thought she would have come with you."

"I'm sorry mom she couldn't come," Jeff apologized "she had to work..."

"It's the least she could do to show her support" shaking her head "why am I not surprised. She never comes home or invites us up there."

"Mom I'm sorry"Jeff said quietly feeling like a jerk for lying to her. He didn't want to tell his mom Diana was an unwed, single mother who stripped for a living. He only hoped that was the extent of it and she wasn't involve in anything else. Her boss was a notorious pimp in Bridgeport. He wondered if she wasn't earning extra money servicing clients. He hoped not. One day he might be in the uncomfortable position of arresting her. He caught Drew watching him and he tried to smile but knew it was forced and half-hearted.

When their mom got up to use the bathroom Drew leaned into him "you're hiding something. What's up with Diana?"

"What gives you that idea?" he asked hoping he'd be able to bluff his way through this.

"Because you were too quick to apologize for her. If she wasn't doing something you knew would upset mom you wouldn't have had the need to cover for her." She looked up at him "so what's she doing? Stripping?" she asked meaning it as a  joke. Seeing Jeff's look of astonishment and shock she squeezed his hand. "She's not is she? I only said it as a joke." She watched as Jeff nodded affirming what she said in jest. "That will just tear mom up. Whatever you don't tell her."

"I won't but I hate lying" Jeff admitted "I'm not very good at it."

"Have you confronted her about yet?" Drew asked.

"No," he shook his head remembering the first time he saw her dancing at that party Terrell had taken him to.

"Take Alex with you when you go" Drew suggested "do it now. Alex is in town and he needs something to get him away from Ali."

"Why can't she leave him alone?" Jeff complained "Doesn't she think cheating on him bad enough she has to drag him through all of her messes?"

"You'd think so but Alex keeps running to her aid. So why should she give that up? If you take him with you to Bridgeport you'll be helping both Alex and Diana."

"What about you?" Jeff asked concerned not wanting to leave her alone.

"I'll be fine. Amanda will come as soon as she can. I'll be ok. Diana and Alex concern me more." Hugging Jeff she said "I love you Jeffie."

"I love you to sis,"he smiled "you'll come to my graduation from the police academy right?"

"I'll go even if I have to crash your party."

"You're invited so there will be no crashing." They fell silent as their mother came back. After a few minutes Jeff announced "mom I have to get back. I have a huge test to study for...."

Worry creased her forehead "I wish you weren't so dead set on becoming a cop."

"I know mom but the more I study the better cop I'll be," he reasoned with her blocking out his sister who was rolling her eyes at him. "Sorry Drew I wish I could stay longer. I hope everything works out with Caleb. One of these days I have to get up here and meet him."

"Don't worry Jeff he already passed Alex's test. He's a good guy."

"He better be because my sister deserves the best." Jeff walked over and hugged his mother and sister goodbye. On his way out of the hospital he called Alex arranging to pick him up on his way out of town.

***

Once Jeff left a doctor approached her "Miss Bennett? I'm Doctor Holden. You're boyfriend is going to be ok." With those words he turned to walk away.

"What about his eyesight?" she asked anxious he answer before he walked away. The doctor made hand dampening motions as he launched into a detailed explanation about head trauma, retinal tearing and some other stuff that made absolutely no sense to her. "I'm sorry could you say that again in a language I can understand."

"I'm sorry Miss Bennett sometimes I forget most people aren't as intelligent as I am." She elected to ignore his obvious jab at her lack of intelligence in favor of answers about Caleb's eyesight. "The blow to Mr Gray's cranium was severe. The force of the impact caused his retinas to detach. I'm the best ocular surgeon there is. I'm confidant in time Mr Gray's eyesight will be restored and he'll be looking up at you with adoration in his eyes." Without waiting for further questions he turned and walked away.

Drew watched his retreating back. She wondered if she should be flattered or insulted that he should believe Caleb's first thought would be her. Shaking her head she let it go. It wasn't worth her time or effort to figure it out. Walking to the nurses station to inquire as to which room Caleb was in.

Sitting beside Caleb while he slept fitfully in the hospital bed. Drew couldn't take her eyes away from the bandage around his eyes. Would he ever be able to see again? The self-satisfied doctor said he would but could she really trust him? She wouldn't believe it until they took the bandages off and Caleb smiled at her confirming he could see her.

Looking up as the door opened she smiled at the girl who poked her head in. "Amanda I'm so glad you're here," she bounced up and gave her sister a hug.

"How is he?" Amanda asked looking towards the bed where Caleb slept.

"They say he's going to be ok," Drew told her "but I won't truly believe it until he wakes up and tells me he can see."

Amanda sat down beside her sister. Took her hand "I know this isn't a good time to tell you this but you need to know and you need to listen." Drew turned to look at her. Here attention directed from Caleb to her, "you're in danger Drew. You cannot I repeat cannot go hunting...."

"Is this a ploy? Daddy told me he didn't want to me to waste my time hunting any more. Said he wanted to move on, cross over when we stopped needing him."

"Yes I know, he told me," Amanda sighed "I agree with him Drew." She saw the shocked almost angry look that came over Drew's face. "I'm sorry honey. There's too many risks in the procedure the scientists are trying. You need to think about what dad wants."

Drew's chin lifted as she mutely refused to accept this appalling turn of events. "No I don't believe it. They're so close. He'll change his mind."

"I didn't think you'd listen but I told dad I'd try." Patting Drew's hand "that doesn't lessen the danger though. Star isn't going to give up. Her anger is focused on you. She sees you as the one person standing in her way of what she wants." Both girls looked at Caleb. Drew reached over to hold his hand.

"Don't ask me to give him up," Drew shook her head "I won't do it."

"I didn't think you would and if Star thought you would she wouldn't feel so threatened.

Staring at Caleb for a moment Drew said "everything Caleb has told me about her conflicts with what she's doing now. What happened? I know dad said that she's become unbalanced but what caused it? Surely it can't be the time. It hasn't even been twenty years yet."

"Dad and I have a theory...."Amanda's voice drifted off.

Looking at her Drew asked "what theory?"

"What do you know about time travel?" Amanda asked her

Blinking in surprise Drew shook her head "only what Grandpa told us about Emit and Oasis landing." Nodding towards Caleb "he was in the future since Star died. Do you think something happend to her when he went there?"

"Something like that," Amanda sighed "you know all of us were effected by dad's death. All of us show it different ways. You in hunting spirits for the scientists. Jeff in becoming a cop. Alex in his music. Me in communicating with spirits. Diana in her desire to become a director even though she's lost her way. Then there's Jennifer. She's been time traveling." Stopping for a moment to gather her thoughts. Turning to Drew she continued "she's messing things up. Things are changing that shouldn't be changed..."

"Jennifer changed something that has fundamentally altered Star, is that what you're telling me?" Drew asked astonished "how do we fix it?"

"I don't know if we can," Amanda leaned forward resting her chin in her hands "the more time that passes from the point of change the more ripples in time we experience. The more changes that happen and most people aren't even aware of the changes taking place."

"But surely the time traveler knows. Grandpa said Emit is aware of all the changes and remains unaffected by them. That's why he's the time keeper."

"Essentially your correct," Amanda turned to look at Drew "I don't think Jennifer cares what changes she makes. She's too caught up in trying to prevent daddy's demise that she's completely focused on that she's become absolutely ruthless."

"She needs to be stopped..." Drew cried"

"Dad's working on it."

"What do you mean?" Drew asked "where has he gone?"

"He's not bound by the same laws of time and physics as we are. He can go into the future or the past at will. He's looking for a way to stop Jennifer before the time keeper has to get involved. Otherwise we'll lose our sister forever and time will spin out of control."

"What if daddy can't stop her? What then?" Drew asked sensing there was more that Amanda wasn't saying.

Amanda got up and looked around the room "if dad can't stop her he'll have no choice but to let Emit detain her."

"Detain her," Drew asked getting up "how?"

"A timeless void," Amanda hung her head it would be like she was dead but forever imprisoned." Tears streamed down her face.

"Dad won't let that happen....he can't," Drew said stunned.

"You don't understand Drew," Amanda wrapped her arms around herself "the damage she's done, the pain, the despair she's caused. People are dead who shouldn't be. People alive that should be dead. Thousands of children wiped out of existence. I feel it all Drew. I don't know why but I'm immune to the changes. I know what it should be and why it's all wrong." She doubled over screaming in pain.

Rushing to her side Drew held her "what's happening? Should I get you a doctor?"

Gripping her shoulder Amanda grimaced "it's another time shift. Changes have been made...terrible things..."

"I'll get mom to take you home," Drew turned to leave.

"Drew I'm sorry you ccccan't," Amanda pushed past the tears "mom's dead I'm sorry."

"What do you mean she's dead? She can't be. She was just here. I saw here not more than two hours ago."

Shaking her head Amanda said "oh honey I'm so sorry. You must have been shielded from the time shift when you held me. It prevented you from changing with everyone else."

"She's she's really .... dead?" Drew asked dropping to her knees.

Kneeling beside her Amanda nodded "in this time she died within minutes of dad. Patricia just kept shooting until the bullets ran out."

"Why do you know these things and I don't?" Drew asked sobbing on her shoulder.

"I don't know. I wish I was ignorant like everyone else. Everyone comes to me now. The spirits of those who have died that shouldn't have. The souls of those that should have been born that weren't. I'm going crazy Drew. It has to stop before I lose my mind," Amanda fell to her knees sobbing.

Drew went to hold her unsure what else she should do. It was too massive, too painful to cope with. Her mom gone? Who raised them? Even as she asked she knew, Uncle Gene. He had always been there for them. He was her support. Her stronghold. "Can you tell me where I live?"

Wiping her eyes "you and Caleb bought a little house not too far from our old house." She smiled as Drew ran over to the bed to check on Caleb.

"Oh I hoped that ...." Drew sighed "not everything changes with each shift in time does it?"

"This time whatever Jennifer did caused ripple effects everywhere," Amanda smoothed her hair "if I had known that you would have been shielded by touching me I wouldn't have let you hold me. I'm sorry Drew. It must be a terrible shock."

"It is but my question to you is can these changes be reversed?" Drew asked ignoring her falling tears.

"I don't know. I hope so."