Generation 2, Chapter 3

As the house was so small, they decided to set up the baby crib in their room. The only other room was with Robert but due to his moodiness they elected not to pursue that option. So it was their room or the hallway so they rearranged the furniture putting most of the extra furniture into storage. Having the baby in the same room would make it convenient when the baby cried during the night.

They were still deciding upon names when Jessica went into labor three weeks early. After twelve hours of labor Jessica gave birth to a healthy baby boy. In a way William was grateful that the new baby wasn't a girl as he was afraid he would have compared her to Sydney. A week later they were able to bring Michael home.

William would get up in the middle of the night and feed Michael, letting Jessica sleep. He was delighted to have this new little one to nurture and love. His heart was mending; although the hole left by Sydney would never be whole, it was a little less empty. After feeding and changing Michael, William sat in their new rocking chair that Jessica had brought home.

He thought about the day when Jessica brought the chair home.

"Honey what are we going to do with that?" William asked as they fought to get it through the door.

"It's perfect for the baby and it'll match the other chairs."

"But Jess we don't have room," William protested wondering if he would have the strength to lug it out again.

"I always wanted a rocking chair when the kids were small. When I saw this for sale, I knew I had to have it."

"Ok, ok where do you want it?" William asked once they had wrestled into the room.

After surveying the room, Jessica sighed realizing William was right. "I, I don't know. You're right we don't have room."

"Well," looking around the room "how about here?" William suggested.

"In the corner? We'll be hitting the wall and ..."

"It's temporary, Jess. Michael won't always be in our room and the damage to the wall won't be anything that can't be fixed."

"And you don't want to carry it out,"

"No I don't. It's here to stay."

William must have fallen asleep in the chair. When he woke he found Robert in the room, holding Michael.

"Hey little bro, I'm your big brother."

Some instinct kept William from moving and giving the impression he was still asleep.

"I promise to do all I can to protect you. If for some reason I let you down I hope you'll know it wasn't because I didn't try. I did all I could or knew how to do to save your sister. But it wasn't enough. Your my second chance to prove I'm not a failure."

"Son you don't have anything to prove," William said unable to remain silent any longer.

"Dad, how long? I thought you were asleep," Robert stammered still holding Michael.

"I heard enough. Do you think we blame you for what happened to Sydney?"

"No not you," Robert said turning away to put Michael in his crib. "I blame myself," he mumbled.

"Son look at me," William said getting up from the rocker. When Robert still stood facing away from him, William went over and put his hand on Roberts shoulder. "Son I'm grateful you were there that night. I know the decision you faced was awful but someone had to make it. You could've all perished in the fire if you hadn't acted the way you had. Sydney sacrificed herself when she chose to push Casey out of the way. If you hadn't carried your brother out, her sacrifice would have been for nothing. Don't you see, you saved your brother's life. You made the only decision you could. Sometimes bad things happen and there's nothing we can do about it. It doesn't make you a bad person or a failure for not being able to prevent it."

"Dad, I'm so sorry. I keep reliving it in my head. I keep thinking if I had done this or did that, things would have turned out differently."

"Son it's easy to look back and wonder what if but all it'll do is drive you crazy. You did the best you could do. No one could ask for more." Looking into his son's eyes William said "Son I know you're finding it difficult to talk to the counselor but do you think that you might be able to now? It might help."

"Yeah I'll try," Robert agreed "Dad, I don't know what I'd do without you." William gave Robert a hug, letting him cry upon his shoulder. This was the first time Robert was coming to terms with the loss of his sister. Holding his son, William wished he could take his pain away and vowed he would do whatever he could to make it better.

"Dad you have a moment?"

"Sure what's on your mind?" William asked turning to Gene.

"Well I was wondering when you were going to teach me how to drive."

"How about this weekend? William suggested.

Frowning Gene said "Why not tonight?"

"What's the hurry?"

"Well..." Gene stopped blushing

"Oh I see. There's a girl."

Shrugging Gene said "Yeah maybe."

"Ok right after supper. I'll give you your first lesson."

"Great."

While preparing supper, Evelyn wandered in "Dad how will I know if I boy really likes me?"

"Has someone asked you out?"

"Charlie Kidd. He seems nice but I wonder if he likes me for me and not because I'm different."

"Does this have anything to do with how things ended with Evan?"

Evelyn shrugged "I really liked Evan but he just wanted one thing. When I refused to put out he dumped me."

"This may be something you need to talk to your mother about."

"I'd rather talk to you."

"Ok," William sighed "Honey there's no sure fire way to know until you take a chance and get to know them."

"But what if I get hurt or make a mistake."

"Well if you never take a chance, you'll never know. You may even miss out on something special."

"So your saying I should throw caution to the wind."

"I'm saying talk to your mother," William mumbled. "I'm not saying this right. Evie you need to trust your instincts. If you think something isn't right it probably isn't. Don't let fear rule your life or you'll find out you're missing out on a lot of great things."

While William spoke with Evelyn and prepared supper, Gene took the opportunity to write a love poem to Pearl. He figured Pearl to be the kind of girl who would like a dopey poem. He doubted she received very many, most guys seemed to be more interested in looks than brains. She seemed to be on the same intellect level as Robert. Gene smirked when he thought that the girl he wanted would have been better suited for his brother. Fortunately for him, Robert was still missing his girlfriend he left behind in Aurora Skies to really notice Pearl.

After supper William took Gene for his first lesson; which was almost his last.

"Gene I said to slow it down," William shouted as he saw how close they were to the side of the cliff.

"Dad I did," Gene said looking at the speed-o-meter that still showed he was going 10 miles over the limit. He took another curve a little too fast and he sensed rather than saw his Dad brace himself in the passenger seat.

"Gene if you want to learn to drive you need to listen to me. If not you can wait and take Drivers Ed in school."

"But Dad the classes are always full and you have to enroll at least a year in advance I'll never get in."

"That may be your only option if you don't slow down and listen."

"Ok, ok you win," Gene slowed down to the speed limit and started to listen to most of what William was telling him.

"Stop," William shouted. "For crying out loud, didn't you see that stop sign?"

"What stop sign?" Gene shot back.

"Do you need glasses? It was in plain sight. Put it in park. We're done."

"But Dad I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

"I said we're done." William said waiting for Gene to do as he said. Once he was sure Gene was complying, he got out and walked around to the driver's side and waited for Gene to get in. They drove home in silence.

"Does this mean that I'll have to take Driver's Ed?" Gene asked getting out of the van.

"I don't know. I'm not sure I can take another episode like this one. You've got to listen to me Gene. If you won't I can't teach you."

"Give me another chance, please. I promise I'll do better." Gene pleaded.

"We'll see," William said going into the house.

"Hey Mikey," Gene said as he picked up his baby brother. "My first driving lesson didn't go so well. You should have seen Dad. I thought he was going to blow a gasket."

Looking down at the smiling face of his brother Gene said "Do yourself a favor, don't turn out like me. I'm trouble and don't deserve the family I have. One day my parents are going to wake up and see me for who I really am." Taking a deep breath Gene continued "I'll tell you a secret. I killed my sister. When they find out everyone will hate me," Bringing his face closer to Michael he whispered "I don't blame them, I already hate myself."