4.3 Don't Go

Andrew woke up to a strange if not wholly unpleasant sensation. Charlie had snuggled up close to him in his sleep. Thrown an arm around his chest. He could feel Charlie's warm breath tickling the back of his neck. He resisted the urge to move so as not to disturb his friends slumber.

"Morning" Charlie mumbled near his ear as he removed his arm and he pushed back the covers to sit up. He moved to the edge of the bed yawning.

"Morning" Andrew mumbled in response sitting up stretching the kinks from his back "sleep well?"

"Fine," Charlie grunted as he got up to dress without looking at Charlie. He padded across the room to his bag.

Andrew watched him in silence unsure if he had done something to offend him or not. Charlie was acting like he was uncomfortable in his presence. Maybe he should ask his Aunt to find that sleeping bag she mentioned the night before. "Did you want company when you see your Dad today?" he asked deciding he would ignore the awkwardness between them.

Charlie's hands shook as he lifted items from his bag. He turned to stare at Andrew "if you still want to come."

"I want to do whatever will help," Andrew told him as he moved towards his own bag seeking clothes for the day.

Charlie froze staring at the shirt he held in his hands. "I want you to come," he said as a sob escaped and his broad shoulders shook as he lost the battle to keep from crying. "Please ... I don't want to be alone."

Andrew pulled him close as the boy broke into uncontrollable sobs. While Andrew held him close he couldn't help but notice how wonderful it felt to hold him against his skin. Then guilt overrode the it. How could he find pleasure while his friend was suffering?

***

"Boys" Jeff said as he came into the room without knocking, startling the half dressed boys. "Um uh" he stammered taking a step backwards "I uh guess I should have knocked."

Andrew's arms dropped to his sides while Charlie stepped back drying his eyes. "It's not what it looks like Uncle Jeff" Charlie mumbled breathing hard.

"Um ok," Jeff said slowly glancing from one boy to the other. "Lisa has breakfast ready for you whenever your ready. Once you've eaten we'll go to the hospital." He turned opening the door "I'm assuming both of you are coming?"

"Yyyyes" Andrew stuttered trying to button his shirt with fingers trembling almost too much to manipulate the buttons through the holes. What had just happened? His mind felt in disarray, full of chaotic turmoil. Why shouldn't he hold his best friend when he sobbed heartsick over his Dad? There was nothing wrong with what he did. Then why did he feel so guilty? He hastily finished dressing moving towards the door, he asked "you coming?"

"Yeah" Charlie mumbled following him from the room looking as shaken as Andrew felt.

***

"You'll have to wait here," the young male nurse told Andrew before he cold follow Charlie into Zayne's room. "Only family is allowed beyond this point."

Charlie looked back fear etched in his handsome face. "I'll be right out here," Andrew assured him "I'm not going anywhere."

Charlie nodded as he turned, straightening his shoulders before entering the room where his father lay motionless upon the bed hooked to multiple machines. "Dad" his voice broke as he leaned over and kissed his pale cool cheek. Blinking back tears Charlie sat in the hard backed chair shoved between machines that were there to presumably keep his dad alive. He buried his face in his hands "daddy I can't lose you. Not now. Not when I have so many questions."

He jerked his head up as the door opened and a man in a white coat entered. "Who are you?" he asked. He watched as the man checked his dad's chart before looking up and absently noticing he wasn't alone.

"I'm Doctor Kasprzak" he said writing notes on the chart. Putting his pen away he walked up to his patients still form shining a light into the man's eyes humming softly as he worked.

"Will my dad be alright?" Charlie asked following the doctor with his eyes.

The doctor's hands stilled for a moment as he thought over his reply. He caught the boys gaze as he said "I wish I could say yes but he sustained multiple injuries that left him extremely weak."

"But he's going to make it," Charlie persisted almost pleading with the doctor.

"We're doing everything we can for him," the doctor told him moving towards the door. He left without a second look or word.

The doctor's final words echoed in Charlies head. Doing everything they can. What exactly did that mean? Did that mean his dad was going to die? He couldn't lose him. He just couldn't. He leaned forward resting his head on the edge of the bed crying.

He didn't know how long he sat there sobbing like a baby when the first alarm went off. His head jerked up as more and more alarms and lights started going off. As the room filled up with medical staff Charlie was pushed back into a corner of the room. He watched in horror as they ripped his dad's bandages open on his chest revealing the gory wounds beneath. Someone started CPR pounding on his chest, while someone else charged some machine.

Charlie wanted to close his eyes. Blot it all out like it wasn't happening but like a horror movie his eyes were riveted to the action. This could be the final moments of his dad's life and he was recording every second of it. For all he knew he could already be gone and all this bustle to save his life was all for nothing. He cringed as they shocked his dad in their attempt to get his heart beating again. Each time Charlie felt the jolt deep within him. He grabbed a nurse pleading "please don't let him die. I still need him. He's all I have. Please..."

A low keening started to fill his ears, slowly building in volume, filling the room. Someone shouted "what's he still doing in here?" Several arms and hands grabbed at him pushing him from the room. 

"Let me stay please. He's all I have." Despite his pleas he found himself staring at a closed door. He turned stumbling into a chair before falling to the floor.

***

"Charlie" Andrew cried as he watched in horror upon seeing his friend being pushed from his dad's room. He had watched in fascination just moments before as doctors and nurses raced into the room responding to the code red alarm. He had hoped it wasn't as bad as it looked. In his heart he knew this might be the worst day in his friends life. He pulled Charlie into his arms, cradled him as he rocked back and forth sobbing.

Andrew was powerless to help, to offer any real solace over a pain he couldn't comprehend. He murmured inane things like "it's going to be alright."

"No it's not," Charlie cried "it's never going to be alright again. I'm not ready to lose him. I need him. If I lose him I'll be all alone. I'll have no one."

"You'll have..." Andrew started to say when the door to Zayne's room opened and the doctor walked out. Looking from side to side the doctor approached them "Mr Thompson?"

Charlie sniffed wiping his eyes dry on his sleeve "yeah" he mumbled standing up.

"I'll be right over there," Andrew pointed towards the waiting area.

"No please stay" Charlie half pleaded grabbing his hand. Turning towards the doctor he asked "how is he?"

"We got him stabilized for the moment" the doctor sighed "he needs surgery...."

"Then do it" Charlie all but shouted at the exhausted man.

"In his weakened condition anymore surgery could kill him" the doctor looked at the distraught young man "I'm sorry the best thing at this point is to wait and hope he gets stronger so he can endure another surgery."

"And while we wait, he could die," Charlie would have fallen if it weren't for the strong arm locked around him, lending him the strength he lacked.

"I'm sorry," the doctor shook his head sadly before he shuffled off.

"He's going to die. They're just going to let him die," Charlie murmured watching the doctor walk away.

"You don't know that," Andrew groped for words to give him hope "your dad's a fighter. If anyone can get through this he can." 

"I don't know. I just don't know" Charlie muttered leaning into Andrew.

***

Later that night as they got ready for bed Andrew doubted Charlie could take another day like today. He wondered as he watched his friend shuffle around the room in a daze, if coming here was such a good idea. "I need a drink," he said going to the door "do you want anything?" He waited  but after receiving no response he left. He didn't know what to do or say that would be of any help to his friend. He felt useless. In the way. Coming into the kitchen he found his Uncle getting a snack.

"How is he?" Jeff asked as he walked in.

"Not good," Andrew mumbled "we shouldn't have come."

Shaking his head Jeff put a hand on his shoulder "don't say that. You've given him a chance to say goodbye."

Surprise and shock shot through him as he looked into his Uncles kind brown eyes. "You don't think Zayne is going to make it, do you?"

"No I don't" he said sadly "I hope I'm wrong but...."

"You don't think so," Andrew swallowed the lump forming in the pit of stomach wishing he had listened to his sister. He couldn't handle this. He just couldn't.

"Andy it's ok to cry with your friend," Jeff pulled him in close "it'll help him know he's not alone."

Nodding Andrew didn't know what to say or do. Was it alright to cry? He had always thought you had to be strong when everyone else was falling apart around you. Was that just him misreading things when he was growing up? He always thought his Dad was strong. Looking back now through a different perspective there had been times he had seen both his parents crying in each other's arms. Sometimes strength came through tears.

"I'll see you in the morning," Jeff told him giving him one last squeeze.

Andrew watched his Uncle for a moment before remembering what he came into the kitchen for. Grabbing a couple of bottles of water he headed back upstairs.

***

Opening the door into his room he found Charlie staring angrily at an innocuous blue sleeping bag. He looked up as he walked in "what's this for?"

"I asked Aunt Lisa for it this morning," Andrew explained setting the water bottles down.

"Why?"

"So we could avoid the awkwardness of this morning." Andrew groped for words in the face of Charlies anger.

For a brief moment Andrew thought Charlie was going to fight him. The he suddenly went limp as he simply nodded and threw himself on the bed. Curling into himself Charlie muttered "goodnight."

Andrew stood transfixed unsure as to what just happened. In the end he simply changed for bed and rolled out the sleeping bag. Turning off the light he lay in the dark trying to grasp what he had done wrong. He thought this would help. He thought Charlie had been embarrassed waking up to find himself wrapped around another guy. Maybe he should have just pretended nothing had happened.

Sometime later he opened his eyes straining his ears for the sound that had woke him up. The room was still dark so he hadn't been asleep long. There it was again, a half strangled sniffle moan. 

Standing up he made his way to the side of the bed where the sounds were emanating. 

"Charlie...Charlie...." he could hear the boy sniffling in the dark "Charlie are you alright?"

After several long moments the boy sat up "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you. I tried to be quiet."

"Don't worry about it," Andrew told him "is there anything I can do?"

Shaking his head Charlie looked down mumbling "hold me. Please I..."sobs drowned out his words. Without a second thought Andrew got into bed beside him and wrapped his arms around him. He could feel the bed moving in rhythm to Charlies sobs. Andrew held him tight as Charlie soaked his shoulder as if he had an endless supply of tears.

***

The next day Jeff accompanied them to the hospital. He sat in the waiting room beside Andrew while Charlie sat with his father. Putting down his magazine he turned a thoughtful glance to his nephew. 

"So what's up between you and Charlie?"

Jumping as his heart beat skyrocketed Andrew closed the book he had been pretending to read. 

"What?" he asked confused.

"Don't play dumb with me," Jeff told him his voice more stern then usual "I saw you two together yesterday."

"It wasn't what it looked like," Andrew protested "he was upset. I was comforting him."

"Uh huh," Jeff gave him a sideways glance "there's more to it than that. It's alright if there is. I just don't want to see either of you getting  hurt."

"He's my friend," Andrew asserted "that's it. I...I have a girlfriend." He stood up unable to sit still and began to pace the small waiting room as thoughts and emotions overwhelmed him. Sheree was pretty, nice, gentle, beautiful green eyes any guy would be happy to have her but something was missing. He had felt the difference between how she made him feel and how Charlie made him feel. His heart beat faster upon seeing him walk into a room, at hearing his voice, his skin tingled when their hands touched. Did Charlie feel the same way about him? or did he just need someone to lean on right now?

Leaning against the wall he could feel is Uncle's watchful eyes on him. He knew he was in danger of falling in love with his best friend. It wasn't fair to Sheree. She deserved better then what he could give her. He knew that but he couldn't let her go. Not yet. Not until he knew how Charlie felt about him. The old fear swamped him. The fear that everything he was feeling was all one sided. The fear that he would be left alone, crying himself to sleep at night.

He couldn't go through that again. He had to bury these feelings so deep inside they couldn't exist. If they didn't exist it wouldn't hurt. He turned at the touch of his Uncles hand on his shoulder. "It's alight Andy you don't have to talk about it right now. When you're ready I'm here."

"Thank you" he mumbled turning to bury his head on his Uncle's shoulder "I'm just so confused. I don't know what to feel."

"I know but I'm here if you need me," Jeff told him patting his back worry lining in his face.

***

Charlie sat in the still room listening to the beeps and blips of the machines. He hated seeing his Dad so still, so frail. He had so much life yet to live. Forty-two wasn't that old. He should have had another forty years. He should be around to see his grandchildren grow up. It wasn't fair.

He leaned forward burying his face in his hands. "Daddy please don't go. I still need you." He felt the hot sting of tears welling in his eyes. He took his Dad's once strong hand in his and clung to it like he did when he was little.

Taking a deep breath he looked at his Dad's still and silent face wishing he could hear his robust voice once more. "Dad I love you. I know you want to be here with me. I'll understand if you have to go. If you have to leave me. Tell mom hi for me and that I love her." He wiped his eyes dry from the near constant flow of salty tears. "I need you to know something. Daddy...I'm gay. I've tried to fight it but I can't anymore. I've wanted to tell you for so long. I know you'd understand. I know you suspected that I was since that summer we spent in Sunlit Tides. When we came back to Bridgeport and I cried every night because I missed him so much."

He looked up gently stroking his dad's cheek. "Remember how you teased me? I tried to tell you it was Indira I liked but all along it was Andrew. He was all I talked about. If I hadn't tried to to be something I wasn't maybe he wouldn't be with her now." He brought his face down to the pillow "it hurts so much seeing him with her. How they hold  hands and look into each other's eyes. I blew my chance. I let Indira convince me not to tell Andrew how I felt. Now it's too late."

He felt a small pressure on his hand looking up he found his Dad's eyes staring at him. "Dad? Dad you're awake." His Dad's lips moved but no sound came out. Charlie leaned in close trying to make out the barely audible words. 

"Tell him...promise..." his eyes rolled back in his head as the alarms started going off.

"Dad, Daddy don't go," he screamed running from the room "help someone help" he shouted as doctors and nurses ran past him into the room. Charlie half turned to follow when a pair of strong arms pulled him close. As the world he knew shattered all around him.

4.2 Being There

"Andrew wait," Sheree called out as he was about to leave for class. Stopping he waited for her to catch up. He had hoped Charlie would wait for them but he kept going barely acknowledging Andrew as he flew past. Andrew wished he knew what was bothering him but Charlie had been reluctant to talk to him since orientation almost two months before.

Andrew knew that Indira had said something to Charlie to make him so stand offish. Knowing his sister she probably told Charlie about his teen crush he had on him. It had been a mistake to confide in her. At the time he needed someone to talk to and he hadn't been ready to mention it to either of his parents. Now he can see how big of a mistake that had been. He was suffering the consequences of that decision by watching his friendship with Charlie fall apart. It's not like he didn't like girls because he did or he wouldn't be semi dating Sheree. Did that make him bi? He wasn't sure. All he knew for sure he wasn't ready to face that part of himself just yet. He already felt out of place. He didn't need that complication on top of it.

"Thank you for waiting," Sheree smiled up at him as he took her backpack from her.

"No problem," he mumbled holding the door open for her

She watched Charlie half jogging ahead of them before asking "is something wrong with him?" Her brow furrowed in concern "he hasn't been the same since orientation."

Nodding Andrew sighed "somethings on his mind. I can't seem to get him to talk about it though."

She turned her concerned look on him "I hope his dad is alright."

"His dad?" Andrew asked heart beating faster.

"Didn't he tell you?" she asked.

"No he never said anything to me," Andrew looked after the disappearing figure of his best friend. He hated to admit it but he had been too wrapped up in what his sister might have told Charlie then in thinking something else might have been wrong.

Sheree took his hand as they walked to class. "His dad was injured on the job a week or so ago."

"Do you know what happened?"

"Not really" she admitted "Charlie didn't seem to want to talk about it and I didn't want to pry."

They came to her class first. He handed her backpack to her. "I'll see you later," he mumbled his mind elsewhere.

***

Indira watched Andrew as he said goodbye to Sheree before approaching him. She ran up along side him as he turned to go towards the Fine Arts building. "You should be nicer to her," she told him.

He could hear the repressed anger in the way her voice vibrated. Frowning  "what?" he asked not wanting to get into a debate with her.

"Sheree, your girlfriend," she grabbed  his arm "she really likes you. But you spent the entire time talking about Charlie."

"She's not my girlfriend," he jerked his arm free from her "besides she's the one who brought up 

Charlie not me. If you're going to eavesdrop at least get your facts right."

"I suppose now you know about Charlie's dad you're going to offer him a shoulder to cry on?" She scowled at him letting her distaste for the guy show.

"What if I am?" Andrew demanded "he's my friend Indira. He'd do the same for me if something happened to one of our parents." 

"I just don't want you getting hurt," she said her tone sweet, concerned "I know how hard it was for you when he didn't reciprocate your feelings...."

"That was over two years ago and it was just a stupid crush," he growled walking away "why can't you just let it go?"

"Because I don't want you to throw away what you have with Sheree," she told him coming up beside him again "she's good for you..."

"Don't you mean she's good for the image you want me to have?" Andrew scoffed "you're really not interested in anything but how it'll effect how people see you and your family by extension."

"That's not true," she cried hurt at the accusation "I care about you too..." she sighed letting him go on without her. She turned to go to her first class her mind occupied with the damage control she would need to do.

***

Walking into his room later that day Andrew was shocked to find Charlie crying curled up on his bed. Tossing his backpack to the floor Andrew sat on the edge of the bed "why didn't you tell me?"

Charlie turned red rimmed eyes towards the sound of Andrew's voice. "I...I" he mumbled before blurting out "he's all I have. I can't lose him. I just can't."

Andrew pulled him close while Charlie sobbed upon his shoulder. "I'm here for you buddy" Andrew said rubbing small circles on his friends back.

A few minutes later Charlie straightened and moved away wiping his eyes. "Thanks," he mumbled.

Eyeing his friend in concern Andrew asked "why don't you go home?"

Shaking Charlie ran his fingers through his messy hair "it was always a possibility that my Dad could get hurt on the job." He took a deep shuddery breath "he made me promise that I'd stay in school...."

"I don't think he meant you couldn't go and see how he's doing. I think you need to go home. You'll never forgive yourself if ..." He put a hand on Charlie's shoulder "it'll make you feel better if you were there in case...." Andrew knew if he were in Charlie's shoes he wouldn't let anything keep him from going to be with his parents.

Charlie took a few deep breaths before nodding "you're right. I need to go home. I need to see my Dad. Will you..." He shook his head moving towards the window.

"Will I what?" Andrew prompted following him.

"It's just" he sighed "I don't want to go alone. What if..." He wrapped his arms around himself as the tears began to flow. "He's in critical condition," he looked up with unfathomable pain and sorrow in his light blue eyes "the doctors don't think he'll make it."

Not sure what to say Andrew put a hand on his shoulder "of course I'll come if you think you need me." No sooner were the words out of his mouth then he found Charlie falling into his arms sobbing.

***

Andrew didn't expect Indira to be happy with his decision to accompany Charlie to Bridgeport but he wasn't prepared for the animosity that it caused. He stood rooted to the floor watching his twins lips twist in anger as she groped for words. "You can't go," she managed to spit out through clenched teeth. Crossing her arms she glared at him "I won't let you" she added as his jaw hardened into stone. It was similar to the look their Dad had often given them as teenagers when they had pushed his buttons once too often.

"You're not my boss," he growled "you can't order me around. I make my own decisions."

"Dad put me in charge," she reminded him with a sneer "what if you have an anxiety attack? How do you think that will make Charlie feel? You know how you are in stressful situations." Seeing his jaw relax and the doubt in his gray eyes she continued "you know I'm right."

Andrew took a step way from her refusing to be coerced into abandoning his friend. "Charlie needs me. I can't abandon him in his time of need. Just because I've reacted badly in the past to stress doesn't mean I will again. I've gotten better...."

She took a step forward putting a hand on his shoulder "I only want what's best for you. I know you want to be there for him but think how it would make him feel. Do you think it's fair to have him worry about you while his Dad is in the hospital?" She saw the doubt deepen in his eyes making his gray eyes darken "he needs to be there for his Dad not worrying about how freaked out the situation has made you. All I'm asking of you is that you think about what's best for him." She stood on her toes to kiss his cheek before walking away with a knowing smile gracing her lips.

***

He watched her go. What she said made sense. What if he did freak out? He could be making a bad situation worse. What if he did more harm than good? He sat down on the nearby couch, unmoving as people came and went around him. A soft touch on his shoulder had him looking up into a pair of bright green eyes.

"Are you ok?" Sheree asked sitting beside him.

He wanted to say he was fine but only an inarticulate sound escaped his lips. Looking away he sighed wishing he had answers to all the questions whirling around inside his head.

"Are you going to Bridgeport?" she asked. He shrugged in response "Charlie needs all the support we can give him right now." She spoke softly without pressure. "I'm sure he'd appreciate your company."

Andrew turned to look at her "what if I make things worse? What if I panic? He doesn't need to worry about me on top of everything else."

"Did you ever consider he might need something else to focus on other than himself?" she asked him "he needs you. All you need to do is be there for him. He doesn't need you to do anything else."

He lifted his face as her words resonated with  him. "I can do that. I want to be there for him."

"Then go" she urged him "I'll see you when you get back." She followed him up and gave him a hug before he walked away towards his room.

***

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Indira demanded once Andrew was out of sight.

"Being a friend," Sheree said turning to face her irate roommate "which is more than I can say for you."

Indira's eyes narrowed "I'm his sister. His twin sister. I know what's best for him."

Sheree snorted "in what world is encouraging someone not to help a friend a good thing?" She gave the other girl a long thoughtful gaze "what are you afraid of? That he'll come back gay or something?"

"Aren't you?"

"No," Sheree stated simply "whether he is or not isn't up to me or you to decide."

"How can you be so calm about this?" Indira asked cocking her head to the side "don't you like him?"

"I do," she admitted. She lifted her bright green eyes to meet Indira's cold gaze "that's why I'll except whatever he decides. We can't decide who we love or who loves us back. I like him enough to let him make that decision for himself and wish him every happiness in the process." She reached out and touched the other girls arm "won't you do the same? He's your brother, don't you want him to be happy? To find love and be loved by his soul mate?"

"This is ridiculous" Indira broke eye contact "he's my twin. I think I know him well enough to know who he should be with."

"Are you sure about that?" Sheree asked "or are you more concerned how his choice may impact your ambitions?" She looked at the pretty dark haired girl with an almost angry gaze. "You do realize that I have two dads, right? Aren't you concerned about your precious image rooming with me?"

"That's different. I have no interest...." her mouth closed tight around the words she was about say.

Shaking Sheree stood rooted to the floor, disgust twisting her mouth. "You were about to say you're not interested in me, right? So I'm ok for your brother because it gives him the appearance of being straight not because you think he and I are good together." Shaking her head she walked past Indira unable to stand the sight of her any longer.

Indira grabbed her arm as she passed "it's not like that..."

"Then what is it like?" she demanded wrenching her arm free as she whirled around to face the other girl.

"I have ambitions and goals that don't include having to explain my brother's sexual preference. It's already going to be hard enough to be taken seriously with the parents I have."

"And you think the only way to do that is to cover up who your family is, because your embarrassed by them? I feel sorry for you because all you're going to accomplish is alienating yourself from your brother and family." Snorting Sheree moved away from the girl "you're delusional if you think this will help you succeed. Family should be a where you feel safe and accepted no matter what or who you are."

Indira put a restraining hand on the girls arm "it's not as bad you make it out to be. All I need is for you to play along for a little while. Andrew doesn't know what he wants yet. A little more time and encouragement from you could tip the scales in your favor..."

"No I won't do this" she shook herself free "it's not right."

***

Indira watched Sheree walk away. She breathed in deeply exhaling slowly through her nose. Why couldn't Sheree see this was for the best? Andrew wasn't strong enough to withstand the ridicule he'd encounter being gay. Being with Sheree would keep him safe if not happy. Helping her image was a side benefit she wouldn't deny. She wanted to be taken seriously and she'd be the first one to admit that her family was a big drawback in that regard. Her dad was in a rock band and had pink hair people see him and presume she's frivolous and flamboyant. Then her mom's interest in the paranormal and the articles she's written chronically her ghost hunting experiences. When people make the connection to her they assume Indira is just as whacked out as her mom is for writing it. She didn't need the added stigma of having a gay brother too. That would be one too many strikes on her credibility. 

"Girl problems?" a deep voice asked behind her.

Scowling she turned to face the speaker. "No" she snorted before walking away.

"Could have fooled me" the male said laughing softly as she stopped to glare at him.

"I'm not...she's not..." snapping her mouth shut she crossed her arms staring daggers at the man.

Putting his hands up in surrender "sorry my mistake."

Indira glared at the purple haired young man with the infuriating grin fixed on his handsome face. 

She had a strong overwhelming desire to help him remove it. "Yes it was," she said turning to walk away.

"Want to talk about it?" the guy called out to her.

"I don't tell strangers my business," she tossed over her shoulder without turning around.

"Well next time honey don't air your dirty laundry in the commons area."

"What did you call me?" she whirled around nostrils flaring.

"Honey" he repeated with a slight smirk, his eyes bright with amusement.

"I'm not your honey" she declared turning her back on him, dark hair whirling around her shoulders.

"Nope I guess not," he said loud enough to be heard.

As she bounded down the stairs she felt the man's eyes following her. His laughter taunting her as she went. How dare he call her honey! She wasn't some sweet confection or some brainless bimbo. Her anger spurred her on until she found herself outside staring up at the night sky.

***

"Your sister doesn't like me very much" Charlie said as they waited to board their plane.

Shrugging Andrew grunted "that's nothing new." He picked up his magazine pretending to be engrossed in the article he was reading.

"It's more than that," Charlie muttered. 

Andrew glanced up then quickly looked away. He didn't want to have this conversation. Things were strained enough between them as it was. He had excepted that there was nothing but friendship between them years ago. He had Sheree now too. He couldn't hurt her. She trusted him, encouraged him to do things he never thought he could. Plus she's the only one he didn't feel uptight around. "You know how Indira is," he mumbled in response.

Nodding Charlie grumbled "I do." A moment later he got up and went to stand in front of the window facing the airstrip.

Andrew watched him with his eyes. He seemed to have more on his mind then just his dad. He had been acting weird since Andrew told him he would be staying with his Uncle and Aunt in Bridgeport. He seemed to have taken it personally that Andrew would want to stay with relatives instead of with him at his dad's place. Andrew couldn't tell him it was a concession he made with Indira. The only way he could get her off his back about taking time off from school to accompany him. Personally he didn't understand why she had been so hung up on it. What would happen there that couldn't happen in their dorm room? Regardless of how stupid he felt her demand was he complied with it. If it made her happy he didn't see the harm. He knew it would only cause more friction between her and Charlie so he kept it to himself.

Things remained strained between them until they boarded the plane. "I'll see you when we get there" Andrew said as he stood to board the plane. He was in first class while Charlie was in coach. It wasn't ideal but it couldn't be helped. They had taken the only seats available on an already overbooked flight. Andrew had agreed to take the higher priced seat knowing that Charlie didn't have the funds. 

He looked up from his seat as Charlie walked past. The stiffness in his movements and the way his eyes darted from side to side made Andrew ache to pull the guy into a brief hug to comfort and reassure him that things would be alright. He smiled up at him hoping to get Charlie to acknowledge him but he just stared straight ahead concentrating on getting to his seat.

Andrew waited for Charlie to deplane before going to meet his Uncle at baggage claims. "You didn't have to wait," Charlie grumbled coming along side him.

"Wow what crawled up your butt?" Andrew mumbled half jogging to catch up when Charlie didn't even stop.

"I hate flying" he said as Andrew caught up with him "sorry I'm...."

"It's ok," he shrugged off the apology "I understand."

As they entered baggage claims a voice called out to them "Charlie".

"Uncle Jeff" Charlie smiled in relief as the older man engulfed him in a hug.

Andrew soon found himself pulled into the huddle. "Andrew I wish I could say it's good to see you but under the circumstances...."

"That's alright Uncle Jeff" Andrew took in his Uncle's appearance. The bruises on his face, the bandage peeking out from under his shirt. "You've been hurt," he exclaimed.

"I'd be dead if it weren't for my partner" he told them. Turning to Charlie "Your dad saved my life." 

He blinked several times before continuing "I know you have lots of questions but it's late. I just want to get you home and in the morning we'll talk. Aright?"

"I don't want to intrude," Charlie protested when he realized Jeff meant for him to stay with him and his family.

"Nonsense," Jeff said to the boy "you're like a son to me. It's what Zayne would want and besides 

Lisa would kill me if you I let you go home to that empty apartment. You're staying."

Once they walked into the house Jeff's wife Lisa welcomed them with hugs and kisses. "I hope you boys don't mind sharing a room..."

"We kind of already do" Charlie stammered as they were escorted to the guest bedroom.

"Will this be ok?" Lisa asked indicating the double bed "if it makes you uncomfortable to share a bed 

we could rustle up a sleeping bag from somewhere..."

"No this will be ok," Andrew said "don't go to any more trouble on our account. We'll manage."

"Don't be silly" she gave each of them another hug before stopping in the door "it's late and I know it's been a long day for you. We'll let you get settled in and we'll talk in the morning."

They nodded as she closed the door behind her. "Are you ok with this?" Charlie asked.

"I am if you are," Andrew said moving to unpack his bag and change into his pajamas. Charlie moved to do the same. "What's the difference? We sleep in the same room all the time anyway." Andrew said sitting on one side of the bed.

"Yeah" Charlie agreed taking the other side. They lay in the dark each lost in their own thoughts refusing to move. "Thanks for coming with me," Charlie said breaking the silence between them.

"You're welcome," Andrew said into the dark. There was so much he wanted to say but couldn't. The darkness of the room seemed to hang heavy around them until they both finally fell asleep.

[Author's Note: If you want to know more about Jeff Bennett and his partner Zayne Thompson (Charlie's dad) you can read their story here.]

4.1 New Beginnings

"Hey short stuff," Andrew said coming into his little sister's room.

She looked up at the sound of his voice then purposely turned away without acknowledging him.

"I'll come home for holidays and stuff," he said as he knelt in front of her.

She sat forward, her long pink hair falling over her shoulders hiding her face "it's not the same," she mumbled.

"I know shortness" he reached up and brushed the hair from her face "you knew this day was coming..."

"I know," she sniffed still refusing to look at him.

"Can't you give me one little smile before I go?" Andrew asked the girl.

Shaking her head Emmaline threw herself onto her pillow sobbing. Andrew stood beside her bed breathing hard, trying to keep from copying her. He hated knowing it would be months before he saw her again. Ever since he had been kidnapped the idea of being away from his family for any length of time would give him severe panic attacks. The only reason he was able to go to University was because his twin was going with him. Stooping he kissed the top of her head before walking towards the door. Stopping briefly in the doorway glancing back, hoping she would relent but she continued to cry into her pillow.

Walking downstairs he found his Mom waiting for him. "Give her time," she said wrapping him in a warm embrace.

"I don't have time," he mumbled into her long purple hair "I'm leaving tonight."

"I know," she kissed his cheek peering lovingly into his eyes "she'll come around."

"I hope so," he said glancing up the stairs hoping to see her bounding down them in her usual bustle of energy.

Squeezing him tight Drew let him go "be good and we'll see you in November."

Nodding he walked outside where his dad stood talking to Indira. He waited silently while his dad hugged and said goodbye to his twin. "Well son, this is it..."

"I'm not ready," he said starting to shake "there's nothing there that I can't learn here."

Seeing the panic in his son's eyes Caleb pulled the boy close. "Son this will be good for you. You need to be able to function without us always being there. There's more to learn at University then facts and figures."

Breathing hard Andrew buried his face in his dad's shoulder "I know but what if I'm not ready? What if I can't do it?" 

"Son you can do this," Caleb patted his son's back "if you get into a situation you can't handle Indira is there to help and if that's not enough your mom and I are only a phone call away." He stroked his son's hair "I have every confidence in you. You can do this."

Nodding Andrew pulled away from him "ok ok I'll try." He gave his dad a lopsided grin "I just wish..." he looked towards the house hoping to see his little sister running towards him.

"She'll come," Caleb told him "don't worry she'll come."

Andrew smiled up at his dad wondering how he could sound so confident. Shrugging he muttered "I don't thinks so. It's a nice thought though." He moved towards the moving van that held all the things they would need while they were away.

"Ready?" Indira asked eager to be on her way.

Looking towards the house one last time Andrew nodded. "You driving first?" he asked.

"Of course" she said walking around to the driver's side. She started the van when they heard someone calling "Andrew wait. Don't go. Andrew." Andrew looked out the window to see Emmaline running towards them, hair and arms waving.

Andrew jumped from the van running towards her. He swung her around causing her to giggle. "So you decided to see me off after all."

Wrapping her arms around his neck "I couldn't let you go without saying goodbye."

"I'm going to miss  you short stuff," he hugged her tight.

Frowning she mumbled against his shoulder "when will you stop calling me that?"

"When you're taller then me," he laughed when she slapped his arm venting her annoyance.

"That will never happen," she looked up at his 6 ft 2 inch frame sighing.

"I know," he smiled down at her "I'm going to miss you a lot."

"I love you too," she squeezed him tight before stepping back "you better go before your highness blows her top."

Glancing back at Indira who was tapping her foot in equal parts irritation and impatience. "The Queen is about to start shouting off with their heads" Andrew quipped in her ear.

"Andrew I'm going to miss you" she stood on her tip toes to kiss his cheek "text me when you get there?"

"Right after I call mom and dad," he assured her walking towards the van feeling better about leaving then he had before.

***

Two days later Andrew drove up to the dormitory he and his sister would be living in their duration at Sim University at least until Indira dumped him for a sorority. He got out stretching his tired muscles. It had taken them two days to drive after they got off the ferry that took them to the main land from Sunlit Tides. He wasn't looking forward to when they had to make the drive home when the term was over.

"Get your lazy ass back here and help me," Indira called from inside the van.

"Watch your language," he chided her.

Rolling her eyes she pointed to several large boxes "you can start with those."

Hopping up inside the van Andrew looked at his twin then at the boxes muttering to himself "I'm so not getting paid enough to do this."

"When you're done with that," she instructed "you can start with these." She pointed at several more boxes

"I'm not your slave," he growled at her while wrestling with one of the large boxes.

"You're my brother," she glanced over her shoulder at him "that's lower then a slave."

He opened his mouth to reply then thought better of it. All it would gain him was a withering look of disdain and a complaint with the parentals about how he wasn't cooperating with her. Indira didn't know the meaning of cooperation. To cooperate to her meant doing as one was told without complaint. He struggled to carry the large heavy box up the stairs nearly dropping it when someone ran past him on their way down. 

A hand reached out steadying him "need help" a familiar voice asked.

"Please," Andrew breathed in relief once they had dumped the box in Indira's room. Andrew turned "I thought that was you" he said smiling at the other boy.

"In the flesh" Charlie grinned. Nodding towards the box "you should have packed lighter or used smaller boxes."

"I did," Andrew told him "this is Indira's."

"I should have known," Charlie shook his head "I suppose that means there's more."

"Oh yeah. I better get back out there before she starts breathing fire," Andrew moved towards the door "thanks for the help."

"Save it until we're done," he said following him.

"You don't have to..."

"I know but judging from the size and weight of that box you'll be dead long before you're done."

***

Once Indira's things were unloaded and she was happily unpacking. It was time for Andrew to unload his things. "Your sister hasn't changed much," Charlie said hopping into the back of the van.

"Nope she's still her overbearing, demanding self," Andrew said distracted with pulling his boxes from the corner Indira had consigned them to. Looking at his old friend "she's still the spoiled drama queen you remember."

"I kind of gathered that by the way she was commanding her slaves," Charlie laughed "I just hope she's gotten over me rejecting her..."

Kicking open the door to his room Andrew dumped the box he was carrying onto the floor. "Don't tell me your interested in her now. If you are, you're asking for trouble."

"Heck no," Charlie shook his head "I just don't want to worry about her thinking I like her since I helped you with her stuff."

"That I wouldn't know," Andrew shook his head "anythings possible."

"Don't you have some weird twin telepathy thing?"

"Sorry," Andrew shook his head leaving the room "we're not that close."

"I'm surprised you're not in the same room" Charlie flashed him a grin as he took another box from the van.

"Indira threw a royal fit at the mere thought sharing a room with me," Andrew sighed "she thought I'd cramp her style if anyone found out we were twins."

"She's way too concerned with what people think and social status," Charlie said "I hope whoever her roommate is she's of the status she wants."

"Or we'll never hear the end of it," Andrew said.

"Why am I getting dragged into this?" 

"You're my friend aren't you?" Andrew asked "as my friend you share in my misery."

"Oh I thought it had something to do with the fact we're roomies."

"We are?" Andrew asked "I didn't know."

"Neither did I until you started dumping your stuff all over my room," Charlie laughed at Andrew's dumbfounded expression "I was worried I was going to have to share a room with a real dweeb..."

***

Charlie looked at his watch "hate to tell you but it's time for orientation."

Groaning Andrew sat up from his bed rubbing his eyes "I didn't even get a chance to relax yet."

"Sorry bud but we've got to go," Charlie ducked the pillow that was thrown at him.

"Is it that important I go," he whined.

"Well if you don't care about getting your class schedule and stuff....then no you can stay here and sleep." Charlie moved towards the door, stopping he asked "you coming?"

"Yeah I'm coming" Andrew stood up and followed Charlie "I hate crowds and meeting people..."

"Stick with me kid and you'll be fine."

"My hero," Andrew put a hand over his heart pretending to swoon.

"Cool it you two," Indira growled "people are watching."

"We weren't doing anything wrong," Andrew complained earning himself a withering glare from his twin. Standing in line to receive their class schedules Andrew noticed the pretty green eyed girl with the multi-colored hair standing to the side of his sister. "Hi I'm Andrew," he stuck his hand out introducing himself an unusual move on his part.

"I'm Sheree," she replied back in a voice barely loud enough to carry above the noise of the crowd 

"I'm your sisters roommate."

"Sorry" Andrew said feeling bad for the girl.

"It's not that bad" the girl said groping for something else to say "she's just..."

"Bossy, demanding, overbearing, spoiled, drama queen" he winked at her growing bolder around the shy quiet girl "I could go on."

"No please stop," the girl laughed "she actually reminds me of my older sister Gwen. She's all those things and then some."

"So you'll get along fine with my twin then" Andrew laughed at the horrified look the girl gave him.

***

"He's not for you," Indira hissed taking Charlie's arm and pulling him to the side. "Andrew may not have noticed the way you look at him but I have."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Charlie protested attempting to walk away.

"Not so fast," Indira tugged on his arm "I had my suspicions that day on the beach. The way you kept looking for him. The way your eyes would light up when he'd come over and talk. Don't try to deny it. You and I both know you like him."

Shaking his head he looked over at his friend talking unaware to the pretty green eyed girl. "I don't think you have anything to worry about."

Indira followed his gaze and smirked "just remember....keep your grubby hands off him. He's not for you."

"Isn't that his decision?" Charlie scowled at her "you act like a jealous ex girlfriend."

"I have aspirations that don't include explaining away a gay brother," she told him her eyes cold as ice.

"Isn't your brother's happiness more important then your social status?" he asked.

She stared at him for a moment unyielding"he'll thank me later from saving him from a life of ridicule."

***

Charlies eyes widened in shock. He was saved from make a comeback by Andrew's voice. "Hey what's up with running off on us like that?"

Charlie shook his head as Indira smiled taking Sheree's arm saying "what was I thinking leaving you alone with my idiot brother?"

Smiling at Andrew the green eyed girl said "oh he was quite charming company." 

The boys watched the girls walk off towards the student union building. Turning to his friend Andrew asked "was Indira renewing her interest in you?"

"Err yeah something like that," Charlie said moving off in the wake of the girls.

"Hey what's wrong?" Andrew asked "I know she comes across brash but she really has a heart of gold underneath all that veneer."

"If you say so," he mumbled. He jerked away when Andrew touched his arm.

"What's wrong?" Andrew asked in concern "if she wasn't professing her undying love for you. What was she saying to put you in this foul mood?"

Crossing his arms Charlie glared at him "if you must know she was warning me away from you."

"What? Why?" Andrew asked astounded.

"She has this crazy idea that I like you" Charlie blurted looking away.

His horrified looked wasn't missed by Andrew. He assumed it was disgust at the idea of being attracted to him. Andrew felt a twinge of disappointment twist his insides. To cover up his true feelings he said "that's ridiculous. We're just friends, right?"

"Yeah friends," Charlie agreed in a flat lifeless tone.

They received their schedules. They had a many of the same classes together. As Andrew chattered away happily regarding their luck in getting the same classes Charlie rubbed the bridge of his nose. 

Breaking into Andrew's chatter he announced "I'm going back to the room."

"Huh?" Andrew watched him turn to leave "what happened to protecting me?"

"You can take care of yourself," he said pushing through the crowd "you don't need me."

"What if I want you?" Andrew asked following him "you're like the only friend I have here." His anxiety building inside him.

"What about Indira? The green eyed girl?" Charlie asked walking faster.

Stopping Andrew watched him go. Indecision had him staring at his friends back as he walked away. 

***

"Is your friend alright?" a soft quiet voice asked nearby.

Shaking his head sighing "I hope so." He turned to smile at the girl who had spoken "why aren't you inside with the Indira?"

Shrugging "I don't know anyone and I'm not comfortable meeting strangers. Your sister promised not to leave me but..."

"She dumped you at the first opportunity that came along," Andrew finished for her "I'm not much for large crowds but if you'd like I could walk you back to the dorm?"

"Thank you" she smiled sweetly up at him "that would be nice" she said taking his arm.

They walked in silence, each trapped in their own thoughts. They reached the dorm when Andrew hesitantly said "it's a nice night. Would you like to look at the stars with me?"

She looked up into his gray eyes smiling softly "I'd like that."

Guiding her to a spot on the lawn where they had a better view of the night sky Andrew sat on the ground. Sheree followed leaning into him "Do you know much about astronomy?"

"Not really," he shrugged "I just find it peaceful to gaze into the night sky." He looked into her green eyes unable to read the emotion within them.

She blinked looking away a shy smile playing across her lips. "It's a bit chilly," she said sitting up "I'll see  you later," she said when Andrew didn't make a move to follow.

"Yeah" he grunted staring up at the stars missing the look of disappointment that flashed across her face before she turned and walked way.